I don’t appreciate someone asking for my preferred pronouns. It’s tedious and redundant. 70-90% of our interpersonal communication is non-verbal, and while it may be evident I am biologically male, it’s equally evident what I’m going for.

Some think ‘Asking my pronouns’ is a kind gesture or accommodation… It’s not. It tells me that you are genuinely unclear of what I am trying to achieve with my transition…. as though you have no idea what signal someone named Julia… with long curly hair, feminine attire, and developed secondary sexual characteristics, could possibly be trying to achieve.

This isn’t to say that I believe anyone should be *forced* to call me anything in particular. Compelled speech is illiberal and problematic. But people who *ask* for pronoun declarations do so because they’ve been taught that it’s the *polite* thing to do, especially those who strike them as gender non-conforming.

Julia Malott

Julia Malott is a Canadian based transgender individual who advocates for bridging the gap between diverse viewpoints on gender identity and ideology. Julia is the host of Alotta Thoughts Podcast which features bi-weekly long form discussions exploring the complexity of sex and gender.

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Julia Malott

Julia Malott is a Canadian based transgender individual who advocates for bridging the gap between diverse viewpoints on gender identity and ideology. Julia is the host of Alotta Thoughts Podcast which features bi-weekly long form discussions exploring the complexity of sex and gender.