A few reflections leading in to tomorrow’s protests…

A few years ago, I watched a teacher get cancelled at a local school board meeting. She was presenting on age-appropriate reading material, and the chair shut her down on the grounds of transphobia and hate.

I wasn’t watching live—back then school board meetings were not the reality television show that they are today.

This teacher didn’t strike me as a hateful. I was curious to know her. I wanted to understand her heart. We exchanged emails, then wine, then each other’s company. She’s now a close friend.

Our political conversation on transgender policy has fallen apart. We are not talking to each other. We are Lambasting one another and creating the ‘other side’ in the most uncharitable terms imaginable.

It’s a missed opportunity to learn something. To grow. To push past these identity politics.

When we decline conversation with those we might currently disagree with, we condemn ourselves to forever disagree.

For no fault of our own, today more than ever we are isolated from the perspectives of those who don’t see the world the way we do. Social media shows each of us exactly what we wish to see: the most reasonable version of our own take and the most dehumanizing view of the other.

If you don’t understand at the deepest level how someone could possibly hold their beliefs, then you don’t understand their world. This is true with religion, with our political alignments, and with our identities.

If all you can see is nonsense, you have an opportunity to look harder. To understand them.

Someone’s else’s behaviour… It makes perfect sense through their lens. Even if you are correct in fact correct, which by the way, you might not be, but even if you are, you’ll never help someone out of an unworkable mind trap if you can’t even fathom how they think.

When you meet someone—anyone—approach them humbly. Don’t try and change them. Learn from them. Live and breathe their experiences. You are bound to agree on more than you disagree

It won’t make a good social media reel—it won’t rally your base. But it will humanize a fellow human. You’ll benefit from it. They will too.

When do this, identity politics fall away and friendship prevails. It’s amazing the solutions that surface when we don’t view other people as the problem we are trying to fix.

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Julia Malott

Julia Malott is a Canadian based transgender individual who advocates for bridging the gap between diverse viewpoints on gender identity and ideology. Julia is the host of Alotta Thoughts Podcast which features bi-weekly long form discussions exploring the complexity of sex and gender.

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Julia Malott

Julia Malott is a Canadian based transgender individual who advocates for bridging the gap between diverse viewpoints on gender identity and ideology. Julia is the host of Alotta Thoughts Podcast which features bi-weekly long form discussions exploring the complexity of sex and gender.